Pages

001

Everyone and most of the people that have blogs has already blogged about their new years resolution and how their past years went. To me, my 2009 year has just only ended now. ( Yes, i know I'm late. haaa) But yeah, reflecting back upon 2009, I don't think I have any regrets whatsoever. Not to say I don't have any regrets because my year was good but because of many reasons I guess.

Through all my years of consciousness, I never have reflected much ...or to be more precise, I have never reflected through every single year of my life individually. Back then, my life was good, satisfying and I was happy enough. Therefore, when I feel happy I'm like whatever..I don't care. I'm happy now...so that's fine. This year I reflected back ..year 2009. For me, everything is this year was a drastic change. Literally, everything. My life, friends, family status, love life, school, lifestyle and whatever you could ever think of. Even physical appearance. Lol. :D

From being so down of not getting what I want, or more likely what I'm comfortable with... I have learnt so many things that I would not have learnt if I did stay in Malaysia. I'm not saying "OH, YEAH. I love Australia! It's great! and Awesome!Because it taught me so much", but more to...If I didn't go to Australia I wouldn't have learnt what life gives you sometimes. I wouldn't have been more conscious about the world and about people. And also, I wouldn't have learnt what I should improve in myself. And most, I wouldn't have learnt how to depend more on myself. For me, going to Australia really felt like God's plan. And although I didn't like it at the start it really paid off. The questions I would always ask God..."why am I here? Why is this. And why is that." decreased so much since I reflected back upon my 2009.

Right now..I can still say I have the desire to stay in Malaysia and have fun. Because I have kept that desire since I left..and honestly, I never loosened my grip until halfway through 2009. Yes, it has been holding me back from progressing in life but to loosen a bit of my grip.. it helped me get through life and also helped me move on , at the same time..lets me hold on. I do care for people in Malaysia. And for certain people..I feel really troubled to not be able to be there for them. I don't know if they need someone. Especially someone unworthy ..like me. But I don't blame my trip because without it, I wouldn't have given a thought about how he/she was feeling. And I wouldn't be more aware of how people also have problems in life. That life is not all about yourself. And I'm really thankful for year 2009. I am definitely looking forward to 2010. Eventhough some things have dissapointed me a bit. I guess that's just how life is.

No comments:

Post a Comment